Should I listen to dating advice? 5 reasons to listen to yourself first before listening to a dating guru
- Team Gridmoves
- 1 day ago
- 5 min read
Updated: 6 hours ago
❓Should I listen to dating advice?
There is a lot of dating advice online. Advice videos. Threads. Podcasts. People telling you what to do, how to behave, and what you should accept or avoid. Some of this advice is thoughtful and genuinely helpful. Some of it is loud, generic, or created by people who see dating as an easy way to gain attention.
🧡Before you listen to a dating guru, make sure you listen to yourself
At Grid Society, we believe the first step is not to block out all advice, but to become clear about who you are and what you want from dating. When you slow down and listen to yourself, you begin to recognise which messages support your wellbeing and which ones do not. Not every message is meant for your life, your season, or your emotional landscape, and that is what we help you understand.
Listening to yourself does not mean this...
When we say listen to yourself, we are not talking about:
❌ Sitting in spiralling thoughts that come from heartbreak or emotional pain
❌ Thoughts that result from overthinking when you feel anxious or upset
❌ Thoughts from a well-meaning friend who tells you what they think you should do
🧡Listening to yourself means something deeper.
It means silencing the environment and giving yourself time to understand what is in your heart. It means writing down your thoughts, organising them, reading them back, and noticing what your true voice is trying to say. It means separating your inner guidance from fear, pressure, or outside opinions. These are thoughts that are steady, grounded, and honest. These are the thoughts you can return to as a dating mantra before you text someone, before you reply, and before you go on a date.
🧡This is the voice you should listen to.
In other words, your real clarity comes from the part of you that has slowed down, reflected, and spoken from truth rather than panic. Not the part shaped by heartbreak. Not the part influenced by fear. Not the part carrying someone else’s opinion. When you allow the quiet, organised part of yourself to lead, your choices become wiser, calmer, and aligned with what you actually want.
5 reasons you must listen to yourself before you listen to a dating guru
1. 💚 Only you know what is happening inside you
A guru can share ideas, but they cannot feel your instincts or the signals your mind gives you. When you check in with yourself first, you become clear about what you actually need help with - and then any advice you take becomes far more accurate.
2. 💚Your experiences shape what you need in love
Your patterns, your past and your boundaries shape your real needs. No guru knows the full story of what you have lived through. When you reflect on yourself first, the guidance you choose afterwards makes more sense because you already know where you stand. And when we say reflect, we do not mean sitting on your bed with your mind racing - we mean slowing down enough to look at yourself clearly, calmly and without spiralling.
3. 💚Advice only works when you know which parts apply to you
You can listen to dating advice - but you must know what belongs to you. When you understand yourself clearly, you can take the parts that help and leave what does not. And that means getting into the habit of asking yourself real questions and answering them in a simple, structured way, rather than letting your mind jump to conclusions.
4. 💚You build self-trust, not dependency
If you always turn to others before turning inward, you cannot see your own patterns clearly. When you pause and look at yourself from a calm, 360° space, your blind spots become clearer - which means the advice you seek afterwards becomes focused, relevant and genuinely useful.
5. 💚Your inner signals speak before anyone else can
You feel discomfort, confusion or excitement long before a guru explains it. When you understand those signals first, you know exactly what part of the situation needs support, and then outside advice becomes targeted instead of overwhelming.
The real goal
When you begin by listening to yourself first, everything becomes clearer. Even the question “should I listen to dating advice?” becomes easier to answer, because you are no longer hearing other people’s opinions through confusion or panic. The aim is not to reject guidance. The aim is to place your own voice at the centre of your decisions so you can recognise what you actually need.
At Grid Society, we encourage you to move away from spiralling and towards calm action - writing things down, seeing the facts and making objective choices. And when you write something once, then again later, you can compare and see your real growth. When everything stays in your mind, it feels sharp but often becomes distorted. Writing gives you something steady and clear to build from, so any dating advice you choose to take afterwards becomes far more focused and useful.
How Grid Society helps you listen to yourself more clearly when dating
JOIN OUR
90-MINUTE WORKSHOP
💚 A simple structure that helps you listen to yourself after every date
When your mind starts racing after a date, you do not need noise, opinions or pressure. You need space to hear yourself clearly. Your Dating Codes gives you a calm, guided system you can return to every time. In ninety minutes, you learn how to slow your thoughts, make sense of your reactions and understand what is actually happening inside your dating patterns — without external influence.
🧡 A menu of 8 activities you can use before or after the date - that help you think clearly, not emotionally
Instead of spiralling or asking for advice, you will have eight clear activities designed to help you understand yourself first. You will check your fears, your patterns, your red flags, your standards, your readiness, your energy, your vision and your clarity - a calm process that brings your mind back into alignment.
Your Dating Power Codes
🌍Join us from anywhere
❌ No Lectures
❌ No Guru's
❌ No pressure to speak
❌ No cameras needed
❌ No breakout rooms
✅ Thinking Time
✅ Practical Activities
✅ Workbook included:
To guide you through the clarity session
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